A Minor Problem

Imagine you’re standing in line to get ice cream in front of an ice cream van that has two windows. Only one of them is open so you stand there and wait. Suddenly the entire child population of your locality descends upon the van, and somehow thinks it’s a good idea to stand in front of the closed one. The first thought that would come to your mind would be “how smart lol” right? But wait, there’s more. The guy inside the van sees the angry mob of six-year-olds banging on the window, and decides to close yours and open theirs. Congratulations. You are officially a minority.


If you’ve gone full Sherlock and realised that this must be a commentary on democracy, being an election issue of Lexicon, good for you. If you haven’t, well, you know now. However, you’d expect me to drop the metaphors and talk about the real deal. But, I’m deliberately sidestepping certain references (like elections, food and exercise (If you didn’t get that, it’s okay. Good, even.)) wherever i can.


Anyway, the question I want to ask is this. How important are numbers really? Sure, they’re the closest we can get to any sort of quantification of opinion, but then, are we getting too close that we’re losing sight of the bigger picture?


For example, here is a representative list of various numbers i care about, in no particular order:

CGPA (such a nerd lol)

Number of gulab jamuns i can get at dinner

Number of hours of sleep i can get each night

Number of days left for the weekend

Number of weeks left for the next set of holidays

My BMI (If you know me, you’ll know this is not the same as the general rhetoric)


Anyway, here’s the point though. Notice how the number of people who agree with my opinions is not on the list. That’s normally a good thing for an individual person, right? Because it means you’re not seeking validation. But, here’s my problem. Apparently, the list isn’t very different even for *cough* elections *cough*. Shouldn’t that thing that’s missing from my list be on this one? Apparently, not. In fact, the only addition to the list would be latitude and longitude, if you know what I mean. And when I was first introduced to the trend I didn’t quite understand it. The only time I was asked where I was from was when I had to be dropped back home, as a kid. And the only languages anyone had bothered to asked me about C/C++/Python (Yep, those are the only three I really know).


If you’re someone like me who tries to “do the right thing” and not conform to set trends, it’s easy to get carried away and think of yourself as some social justice warrior, who is a mutant blessed with the ability to see through that which others cannot (that’s a line from somewhere right? I can’t remember which though), and like Uncle Ben said, with great power comes a great catchphrase if you die early in the series. (I paraphrase, of course) But, remember the ice-cream truck kid? You’re that kid now. (NOOOOOOO. Yes.) So, if you think you’ll be able to open your window by focussing on all the other kids, you’re solving the wrong side of the problem. The privileged don’t bargain, and any effort based on the selflessness of the privileged is pretty useless, because then there wouldn’t have been the second line in the first place. There are only two things you should be looking at. Either get your own group of friends to turn the tide, before the van even shows up, or take it up with the guy inside the van, who has nothing to lose either way.


Finally, here’s something unrelated (not entirely, but sufficiently) to think about. Does it really make sense to employ the incumbent body of representatives as a neutral arbiter for elect**ns (*shudder*), instead of as an advisory body to prepare candidates, even for debates and presentations, with the whole process moderated by an external body, like, say, the media?

Abhinau Kumar V


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